"His Joy Comes In The Morning..."

I have noticed that the past couple of weeks I haven't been very joyful. Pretty much since I moved out of my house. Maybe its the fact that I am homeless, even though I have had fabulous roofs over my head. I feel like the past couple of weeks I have been like a zombie going through the motions of life, but not really feeling too much or caring about much. If someone were to ask me if something is wrong, I could confidently say "No, everything is going well." So why no joy?

I honestly don't know. I have been spending more time with the Lord that I typically do because I know that HE IS MY JOY. In my seeking Him, I still feel like He is holding ME at arms length. Hmmm? I am confident that I am in His will, but it seems like that is all He is giving me is just the assurance that I am doing the right thing. I want more. I want joy, excitement, passion for life...yet I'm just chillin'...obeying. Like He is waiting to see if I will continue to walk in His Truth even if I don't get to see "why." This is new to me...

The weird thing is that it is also very comforting to know that I still have not even come close to fathoming how majestic He is. He is at work all around me, and in me, even when I can't seem to "feel" it. I seem to try to make this experience that I am having with the Lord right now make sense from what I already know about Him...and I am coming to realize that God cannot be COMPLETELY conveyed on pages (not even the pages of the Bible). He is a person who is ALIVE...and I have to be in relationship with Him to learn these new things about Him. I am realizing that my Creator and Master is beyond what I can put together and make fit smoothly. He actually is pretty complex...

...yet my relationship with Him is so simple. He keeps whispering to me..."JUST LOVE ME."

so I will...I will just love Him and wait for His joy to come......:)